


The Days Were Like Nightlights

by skinandbones



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Additional Tags to Be Added, Alternate Universe, Anal Sex, Angst, Denial of Feelings, Developing Relationship, Fingerfucking, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pining, Rimming, Romance, Side Story, Smut, shifter! kise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-07
Updated: 2015-05-25
Packaged: 2018-03-16 17:27:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 17,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3496709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/skinandbones/pseuds/skinandbones
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kasamatsu's job is to be the captain of the team. To be the pillar of strength among his men but he never expects to be paired up with an unknown variable who seems to take quite a liking to him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. when he fails

**Author's Note:**

> So I decided to make KiKasa drabbles and their days in Kaijou, along with their developing relationship. I recommend you guys to read Thunderclap so you have an understanding of the setting and all that fun stuff or you can send me questions on my Tumblr: heartlessblu

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kise: A shifter who is originally a golden retriever and has the ability to become human, but Kaijou's medical team experimented on him which enables Kise to change into different animals. Kise's home was taken from him after Rakuzan found the home where all shifters were at and kidnapped them for underground dueling where they fought against each other for entertainment.
> 
> Kasamatsu: Captain of Kaijou who serves under his superior, Kobori. Kobori placed Kasamatsu in charge of Kise.
> 
> Kaijou: A reconnaissance/military group who serves Rakuzan. They mostly go on missions to find new shifters to bring back or silence any traitors who are against Akashi, etc.

“Please…” The man pleaded. His head bowed lowly as he prostrated him in front of Kise. “Please don’t kill me, I beg of you! I’ll do anything! If it’s money you want then I’ll pay you!” His body shook with fear and his breathing became erratic as if he was being suffocated.

Kise stood with a gun pointed at the man. This was his mission? He can’t kill this guy like this, it was wrong. The whole picture was messed up. The man in front of him spilled secrets to various third parties and immediately, Rakuzan ordered Kaijo’s team to take them out. 

_I want them all dead._

Whatever happened to just talking it out? Maybe they can establish some kind of agreement instead of this? His finger refused to pull the trigger but he knew he had his orders. 

Kill him. 

He wasn’t ready for this, no matter how many times he shot a target back at the shooting range, he couldn’t do it to a human being. 

“I-I…” Kise swallowed and lowered the gun. “I can’t do this.” He said quietly as he looked downwards in shame. The feel of the gun felt heavy between his fingers.

Kise looked to his right as he felt a warm hand on his shoulder. “It’s okay.” His captain said before he took the gun from Kise’s hand and finished the job himself with a quick bullet to the head. Kise winced at the loud bang and frowned as he saw the red pooled around the dead man.

“Sorry, I thought I could do it but-I don’t know-he didn’t want to die. I saw it in his eyes and I… it-it’s not right.” Kise bowed his head into his hand, shuddering at the horrible feeling eating him away.

“It’s okay, it’s not your fault. I told them you weren’t ready for this, that you needed more time before we can send you out to the field.” Kasamatsu said and held Kise by the back of his head. “Just breathe, Kise. Take a deep breath and focus on me.” He allowed the shifter rest on his shoulder while he gave what little comfort he was able to offer by stroking the hairs of gold.

Kise nodded his head and steadied his breathing while he closed his eyes. He started to calm down from the hand over his head. He always liked the way Kasamatsu cared for him and how he never forced him to do anything he didn’t want. Kasamatsu respected him as he would with his other teammates, always making him feel like he belonged and comfortable during tough times. It was really nice of him. 

“Are you ready to go back?” Kasamatsu asked him, breaking the silence.

“Do we have to?” Kise questioned when he lifted his head from his resting spot with a hint of a whine in his voice.

“You know the answer to that.” 

Kise pulled back and stared at Kasamatsu. “Can we stay here for a little longer? Like go outside of this place?” The scent of blood irritated his nose and maybe a breath of fresh air would help.

He heard the captain let out a sigh and agreed. “You have five minutes.”

“Thanks, Kasamatsucchi!” He bolted out the door and heard a quick cry from the captain behind him. He wasn’t planning on escaping, he already knew that much. He touched the black metal around his neck and settled right on top of large shipping crates stacked up on each other overlooking the water, his legs dangling over the edge. 

The waves were calm around this time of night and listening to the mini waves splashed against the barge helped soothed his nerves. Better than listening to a man begging to be spared. The smell of blood ceased and the cool air washed over him with the scent of the ocean breeze. He then heard some shuffling next to him. “I wasn’t going to run away, you know. I can’t even if I wanted to.” He tugged the metal band again with a little more force.

Kasamatsu didn’t reply.

“But for once, I would like to not feel this burden. Trapped by this stupid thing like I’m some slave…” Kise tugged it harder with a grunt but Kasamatsu held his wrist, pulling away from the collar. 

“Dumbass, you’ll bruise if you continue to do that.” Kasamatsu looked as his neck and Kise saw the pity in his eyes. Kise faltered and his hand fell to his side. He stayed still, eyeing at the hand situated around his neck as a thumb caressed the area underneath the metal.

“I’m not going to break that easily, silly.”

“I don’t like to see you hurt yourself. A captain always take care of his partner. ”

Kise let out a small grin. “It takes more than that to hurt me. Really,” He reached and grasped Kasamatsu’s hand, feeling the rough fingers beneath his. “You worry too much. If you keep it up, eventually Kasamatsucchi is bound to get white hairs in his early age.”

Kasamatsu scoffed. “As if you haven’t had some already.”

“What?!” Kise looked at his strands of hair and starts pulling apart some to see if there were any. It doesn’t help when he has short hair and didn’t carry a mini-pocket mirror around. His frantic behavior caused Kasamatsu snickering. “It’s not funny! I can’t have any of that, I’ll look hideous!”

“Don’t be so melodramatic.” He bopped Kise’s head and got up. “And you’re not that ugly, for starters.” He smirked before he took his own leave off the crate. “Hurry up or I’ll leave you behind.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?! Wait for me, captain!”


	2. when he starves

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Set in Thunderclap]

Once Kise became Kasamatsu’s official partner, despite Kasamatsu’s transfer request, he was given a room next to the captain. The captain offered his hand and helped arranged the basic necessities to get things in working order. Built-in cameras were added in different corners of the room for security purposes and a keycard slot, which the card was in Kasamatsu’s possession, allowing only the captain to enter at certain times when Kise wasn’t allowed out. Inside the room was fairly simple with white walls and beige-colored carpet. The room came with a bedroom and a working desk and chair, along with a connecting bathroom. In the small living room had a couch backed to a wall and coffee table right in the center but no television. It was nothing grand. Kise was convinced he would be put in a cell and even laughed about how Kaijou was too kind to treat him so ‘fairly’. 

He didn’t mind the cameras much, he said to Kasamatsu. At least he had all this space to himself but he whispered in his ear about whoever was behind the cameras was a pervert. Kasamatsu raised his eyebrow and whacked Kise over the head about not be so disrespectful to his higher-ups, but he made sure to send word to Nakamura about it.

Nakamura wasn’t too happy. 

“If you have concerns about your room then let me know. I can pull in a few requests if they are necessary.” 

“Yes sir!” Kise mocked with a salute and Kasamatsu rolled his eyes before leaving Kise to his own doings. 

But after he got used to the room without any complaints, things became different. With Nakamura in charge of the cameras, Nakamura sent Kasamatsu a message about Kise’s health. The shifter hasn’t left the room for a while especially when it was time for regular meals plus the lack of sleep he was getting. Nakamura didn’t specifically state the reason why and told him it was the captain’s job to take care of his teammate. Remedy the problem. 

And Kasamatsu came down the hall carrying a tray full sandwiches and a bowl of hot chicken broth, thinking it would do Kise some good instead of continually starving for the remainder of the night. He arrived in front of the shifter’s room and knocked on the door. “Oi, Kise. I’m coming in.” After seconds of not getting a reply, he tried again.

“You haven’t eaten at all today and there’s no point in trying to starve yourself.”

Nothing.

The captain sighed and took out a keycard from his pocket and inserted into the slot under the door handle. With a click and a green light, he opened it while carefully handling the tray with one hand. With a flick of a light switch, the living room was empty so he set the tray on the coffee table.

He went to the bedroom and spotted Kise lying on his side with his back facing the captain. 

“Hey, Kise?” He came over and shook the man. 

“I’m awake, senpai.” The shifter said but he didn’t turn from his position. He sounded tired, more tired than he let on which worried Kasamatsu a bit.

“You don’t sound too well and please look at me when I’m talking to you.”

“But senpai will find me ugly if he sees me.”

“The hell are you-”

“Ah, I was playing with you.” Kise answered quietly and turned until he was staring at Kasamatsu. He sat up straight with his legs crossed and mulled over the messy hairdo with a hand.

The captain’s eyes widened at the straining look on Kise’s face, how he was developing small circles around the eyes. Even his face lost that bit of shine that it used to have. “Dammit, what have you been doing to yourself? I was told you’re not eating and sleeping properly. I brought some food for you so let’s go and get you fed.”

He got up but a hand tugged on his sleeve, stopping him from leaving. 

“Wait,” Kise’s grip became tighter in his hand. “Please hear me out.”

Kasamatsu saw the small desperation in those honey-colored eyes and sat right back down, Kise’s hold never left its place. “Alright, tell me what’s going on.”

“Well, you see…” Kise tried to speak but he bit his bottom lip. 

“Take your time, I’m listening.” Kasamatsu placed a hand over Kise’s shoulder.

“I thought I would be okay with it, y’know? A room to myself and it seemed alright at first. The room’s a bit bland and it can do a lot with some color but it’s something?” Kise shrugged and forced a smile. “But it’s too quiet, I start to dream I’m in a cage again. Small and suffocating like something was draining the life from my body. I would hear voices in the dark, crying and screaming in pain like I’m back reliving that day. The memories of their faces before they died…”

His lips trembled with fear, his entire body shuddering as he continued on. “It was so clear to me.” Kasamatsu ran his hand across Kise’s back, stroking in circular motions as he listened attentively without disturbing him.

“So I figured if I didn’t sleep, I wouldn’t have to deal with these nightmares and that they go away.” Kise slapped a hand on his leg. “Heh, I’m sorry, captain. I didn’t mean to make you worry, I just… I don’t want to stay here anymore. Can I-can I stay in your room, please?”

Kasamatsu blinked as if he misheard what he said. “What?” 

“Yeah, like I’ll stay with you from now on. I promise I won’t take up the whole bed. I mean, I can sleep on the couch if you want me to or we can get a separate bed for me-”

With a quick pinch of Kise’s lips, Kasamatsu managed to stop him. “Hold on a sec. I didn’t even agree to this and you’re not taking my bed, there’s barely any room! It’s meant for one person so it’s a no and the couch is not a place to sleep on, by the way.”

Kise’s laughter rang in his ears. He might saw a bit of a gleam coming back to him already. Kasamatsu released his mouth and the shifter cried out amusingly. “How scandalous! Already thinking of sleeping together, what will your friends think of you?”

“Wh-what?! I did not, you’re the one who thought of it first, you idiot!” Kasamatsu argued back while feeling a bit of heat in his cheeks, either from embarrassment, anger, or a mix of both. 

“Okay, yeah I admit I did but you didn’t deny it at all. I don’t mind sharing it and you can be my heater when it gets cold.” 

Kasamatsu face palmed, couldn’t even believe how ridiculous Kise can get. “I swear to god…”

And the two argued for a whole minute before Kasamatsu shushed the shifter, allowing him to his own thoughts. He thought more of Kise’s dilemma, how he never thought he would end up having this sort of problem, but he respected and admired the shifter for opening up to him. He felt a bit guilty if he were to really say ‘no’ to him. It was complicated, but he would try and make the best out of it.

After all, he was stuck with him for a long time.

“I’ll talk with the guys and see what they can do about moving you in with me, professionally speaking of course, and I believe it would greatly improve your state of health.”

“Really? Are you being serious?” Kise’s eyes started to water a bit but he wiped them with the palm of his hand as Kasamatsu gave a firm nod. “Th-thanks Kasamatsucchi, you’re the best.” He gave a delight look and wrapped his arms around the captain, snuggling him tightly like he was some sort of pillow.

“Argh, get off me!” Kasamatsu tried to wiggle his way out, but Kise refused while wearing a big grin on his face. “I don’t know where you’re getting your energy from but I recommend you eating some food before it gets cold.” 

“Fine…” Kise pouted and allowed Kasamatsu to go free.

Kasamatsu left to grab the tray and came back, putting it on the bed so Kise can eat. “There are turkey sandwiches and some chicken soup. Eat up and get some sleep after. I expect you up and early eating a proper meal. Got it?”

Kise bowed his head. “Did senpai make this for me?” He took a bite of the sandwich and groaned. “It’s really good.” He ate more of it before devouring the entire thing in seconds.

“Somewhat…” Kasamatsu only made it because the cafeteria was closed and no one was up to prepare the food for him. So he tried and grabbed the ingredients necessary except the soup, which was already made and stored in the fridge so a quick heat up in the microwave did the trick.

“Thank you.” His eyes returned to their natural brilliance and he began munching on another sandwich.

“You’re welcome.” Kasamatsu saw the fondness in Kise’s eyes and knew he did the right thing. 

Once Kise was satisfied with his meal, Kasamatsu bid him a good night.

“Wait. Don’t leave, can you-can you stay here? I don’t know if I can sleep but just in case?” Kise pleaded more than a simple ask.

Kasamatsu was too tired to say no. If he did, he imagined receiving an onslaught of Kise’s crying about how mean he was or just seeing him overly depressed. “Fine, I’ll stay but this is the only time so in the bed you go.”

“Wah! You’re really spoiling me today. First, a dinner in bed and now we’re having a sleepover. Say, will you tell me some bedtime stories so I’ll sleep faster?”

Kasamatsu tightened his lips and closed his eyes, calming himself from the frustration that seemed to tick him every time Kise spouted a comment like this. He brushed his hair back and downwardly massaged the tight muscles in his neck. 

“I’m kidding! It was a joke, I won’t say it again!” Kise bounced back on his bed and rustled underneath the covers with his head plastered against the pillow comfortably. He faced Kasamatsu as he scrunched the blanket tightly in a grip against him. “So-ugh, you’ve been really kind to me so thanks again… good night, Kasamatsucchi.” He yawned and closed his eyes.

“Told you not to call me that.” Kasamatsu whispered, and probably won’t be able to stop Kise from saying it. Kasamatsu stayed where he was, always watching and waiting as the shifter’s breathing came to an ease. He slowly moved his hand and softly touched the silky hair, liking the way it felt against his skin. 

“I pray the rest of your night is full of pleasant dreams.”

The next morning, Kise woke up and found a sleeping captain resting against the headboard with his hand in his.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kise had a nightmare and it’s Kasamatsu to the rescue! Holding his hand the entire night helps. –sighs- And I swear to god, Kise has a really affectionate personality or just loves to rile Kasamatsu for the hell of it. I give up.
> 
> Comments are appreciated!


	3. when he sleeps

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Set in Thunderclap]
> 
> Thank you for the kudos! Here's the next chapter so enjoy. 
> 
> Work is unbeta. Any comments or questions, you can find me on Tumblr: heartlessblu

Kasamatsu stirred in his bed, feeling a soft appendage tickling his legs. He curled his legs up but the strange feeling continued to follow up, caressing his bare calves in a slow sweeping motion. His eyes shot wide opened, remembering he had someone sharing a bed with so he removed the covers with haste and sat up, eyeing at the retreating tail like it got caught red-handed. 

“It’s too damn early for this, Kise.” Kasamatsu groaned as he spotted his clock highlighting 5:01 in the morning. He felt warm arms tightened around his waist in reply. “Don’t make me kick you off the bed.”

“Sorry, senpai.” Kise said as his tail disappeared completely and hugged Kasamatsu closer while rubbing his entire face on his side. “But you’re so warm, it’s feels really nice. You should turn on the heat more often so I don’t have to freeze to death.”

Incredible.

“It really isn’t that cold.” Kasamatsu admitted and gave up escaping from Kise’s clinginess. Ever since Kise moved into his room, he became highly attached to captain because he liked having his very own personal space heater despite getting kicked around no matter how many times Kasamatsu tried to get away. Kise was very stubborn and skilled in getting under Kasamatsu’s skin.

“But I’m really sensitive to the cold! And it’s not even winter yet…” Kise whined in response.

“Oh really?” Kasamatsu raised a brow and pinched both of Kise’s cheeks, watching the shifter cry out in pain. “Are you sure about that?”

“I am! I am!” Kise wailed before he quickly nipped Kasamatsu’s fingers in retaliation.

“Wh-What was that for?!” Kasamatsu scowled and pulled his hand back. He wiped the wet feeling on his shirt and glared at the man snickering at him.

“Nothing.” Kise with his smug face, stuck his tongue out before claiming his heat once more. 

Kasamatsu rolled his eyes at the child-like behavior. “Hmm…” He laid back on the bed and brought the covers over his chest. He turned his head and gently asked. “Do you still have nightmares?” He remembered how Kise would wake up in the middle of night at random times whimpering and shaking in his sleep while Kasamatsu tried to console him. A cup of hot tea would do the trick and he even resorted to story-telling because Kise liked to listen to the sound of his voice. He wasn’t sure why but whatever helped Kise to calm down, he tried.

“They’re not as apparent as before. You helped me go through with it, after all.” Kise’s smile seemed to wash away any worries he had. 

“That’s… that’s good.” Kasamatsu nodded, feeling the tension in his body relaxing. 

Kise released himself from Kasamatsu’s side and sat up looking intently at him. Kasamatsu stared back, unsure of his intentions but when a hand reached out and rested over Kasamatsu’s cheek, he held back his breath and steadied himself.

“Hey,” Kise brought the side of Kasamatsu’s mouth upward with his thumb. “You should smile more often, it’ll make you look cuter.” His lips curled into a grin. “Sometimes I think you have a lot of stress weighing you down. I’m sorry for that, it’s my fault for making you do these things for me. I’d be useless on my own without you.”

Kasamatsu stayed still, allowing the small touch but with the view of Kise’s face hovering over him, he couldn’t help but mentally note how handsome he looked. He had the look of a model but Kasamatsu could never admit that, at least not in front of the shifter and with a shirtless one in his bed, it doesn’t really help much to quell his eyes from doing a quick roam at the well-developed body.

He swallowed the lump in his throat before he managed to speak any further and ignoring that cute comment for a later date. “Wh-what’re you spouting about? It’s not your fault when it was my decision and my decision alone to help you. It is the captain’s job to take care of you so you won’t suffer anymore, okay? You’re an asset to the team so don’t belittle yourself like that.” 

The captain raised his hand into a fist and bonked Kise’s forehead without much force. “And for one thing, you’re not useless. You’re alive, fighting with everything you got so I don’t want to hear none of that crap from you, understand?”

Kasamatsu saw the look of surprise written on the shifter’s face and quickly soften to a more sincere-like expression. “Mmm… Yeah, you got it. I couldn’t ask for a better captain.” 

“Good.” Kasamatsu withdrew and pulled the covers over him before he laid on his side, facing away from Kise. His face felt a bit flushed. “Go back to sleep, we have the day off today and I rather enjoy it whenever I can.”

“Sounds good to me.” Kise shuffled around and settled himself underneath the covers. He happily sighed and moved closer. Kasamatsu felt those familiar arms around him craving for contact once more and his back met with Kise’s front. Without any resistance, he shut his eyes to the dark and heard the quiet breathing teasing the nape of his neck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. Comments are appreciated!


	4. when he runs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Set in Thunderclap]
> 
> Work is unbeta.
> 
> And glad to know people are reading this story, yay :).
> 
> You can find me on Tumblr: heartlessblu

The alarms blared loudly in every corridor, signaling an emergency as the entire area of Kaijou went on lockdown. The metal barricades released and slowly coming down as they blocked every entrance from anyone escaping while security went on high alert, and hybrids were put back to their living quarters. 

_Section 1 is locked and secured._

_Section 2 and 3 secured._

“No sign of him yet?” Kasamatsu spoke into his headset as he ran down one hall and made a sharp turn. 

_I got nothing on the radar, captain._

_Section 4 is closed, sir._

“Where was he last before you lost track of him?”

Nakamura spoke into his ear. _Section 5. He was at the gym for quite some time before one of the trainees discovered his collar lying on the ground and a few men knocked out, they might be feeling the pain once they wake up. ___

__“How he managed to escape? Did the cameras catch anything?” Kasamatsu asked as he left Section 4 and moved into the next part of Kaijou’s facilities._ _

___He must’ve discovered one of the camera’s blind spot and took his chance. I got nothing coming up with Section 5’s cameras but we’ll keep on the lookout. He could also be in sixth somewhere but I’m getting a blank._ _ _

__“Got it, I’ll contact you once I get his location.”_ _

___Understood. By the way, Kobari is not happy about this so expect a long lecture from him. Rakuzan has been notified of this situation as well so prepare yourself for some fire._ _ _

__Kasamatsu wasn’t surprised at the slightest. It was his fault for not keeping a closer eye on Kise despite his trust in the shifter. There wasn’t a point in trying to escape, he reminded Kise many times and he understood. So why? He never thought Kise would actually attempt it._ _

__“Heh, duly noted. I’ll handle this, Kasamatsu out.” Kasamatsu shut the communication line and entered section five._ _

__Section five was a hospital area with its clean white walls and rooms filled with experiments and resting patients, but now the calming silence filled the air as Kasamatsu walked along the spotless floors. No one was in as they were cleared out before the lockdown._ _

__Kasamatsu pressed the button on his headset and spoke. “Shut the lights off. Maybe I can find some remnants of a heat signature.”_ _

___You got it._ _ _

__All of the lights turned off, leaving Kasamatsu in the dark. He took out a small thermal reading binoculars and held them to his eyes. What he saw through them was mostly shades of purple as he continued to walk. He opened the doors that led to various offices and patient rooms but nothing read as heat. He heard no sounds of feet scuffling around or door squeaking along while he paced himself. The place was completely empty._ _

__He moved on and ended at the entrance leading to Section 6 with the barrier in front of him. What caught his attention were the small foot prints leading beyond the hospital. He bent a knee down and studied the heat signature closely._ _

__Bunny prints? Kasamatsu questioned. A good choice. An animal that was quick on its feet and small enough to slip through the camera’s field of vision._ _

__“I got a reading on him, he’s in six so you think you can let me in?” He said as he turned on his comm._ _

___Sure thing, captain. What do you think he’s doing in there? It’s nothing but a warehouse for the hospital to use. It’s pretty much a dead end for him._ _ _

__The passageway opened._ _

__“I’m betting he got lost along the way.” His shoulders sagged and a sigh escaped his lips. “Thanks.”_ _

__No problem. Bring him back, tell him we miss him, or he’ll end up crying or something. Before you get your butts kicked anyway._ _

__Kasamatsu snorted and opened the door._ _

__There was nothing grand with this particular section, only a set of staircase led down to the storage. Once Kasamatsu got off, he turned on a light switch, the whole area lit up revealing many large boxes and crates stacked up in towers that seemed to extend forever. Some of them were tightly packed with plastic wraps while others already opened, the floors scattered with a bit of foam peanuts._ _

__“Kise?” Kasamatsu called out as he moved onward towards the rows of inventory. “It would be nice if we can talk.” He shifted his head to the right and left as he passed through them but he didn’t get a response from the shifter. It would take him some time before he can fully inspect this entire place so he decided to climb to the top of the towering boxes, carefully grabbing onto their edges while keeping his feet steady without slipping._ _

__“I swear, Kise…” Kasamatsu set himself upright and looked around, seeing if he can spot the noticeable ball of sunshine. Suddenly a hand waved at him at the last set of boxes in the distance and Kasamatsu quickly moved, jumping from one row to another until he found himself facing Kise._ _

__“Oi,” Kasamatsu scowled. “There you are, I’ve been looking for you. You got everyone all stirred up.”_ _

__“I messed up really badly, didn’t I?” Kise tried to put on a smile as he watched the captain take a seat next to him._ _

__“Amongst other things, yeah. Knocked out a few people here and there, making a mess out of everything. I imagine Kobari will be hounding on my ass along with Akashi paying us a little visit after this.” Kasamatsu shrugged since he was used to Kobari’s way of doing things, but with Akashi, he would prepare himself for the worst._ _

__“I’m sorry…” Kise stared downwardly as he sported a frown._ _

__Kasamatsu smacked the back of the blond’s head. “Idiot, what were you thinking? Did you really think this would work out?”_ _

__“Yes? No-not really but maybe? I wanted to try, you never know. I would’ve made the headlines or something. And you’re probably wondering how I got the collar off too.” Kise answered with that hint of confidence he always had, but Kasamatsu saw Kise’s hands gripped his own pants into a tight fist._ _

__“That would help.” The captain answered._ _

__“The collar slipped off when I shifted into a smaller animal.” Kise said with a grin._ _

__“That easy, huh?”_ _

__“Yup, I was surprised myself because I thought it wouldn’t work but it did! I should’ve done that long ago.”_ _

__“I see.” With the collar proving to be a failure, he would have to inform Kaijou’s engineering team to start on a new collar for Kise, something that would automatically adjust itself despite the size of the animal._ _

__“I guess that’s something we would have to fix on our part.”_ _

__“Yeah I guess so.” Kise responded somberly, leaving Kasamatsu unsure of what to say next. Kise was upset, that much was obvious and he didn’t want to upset him any further. Wearing the collar was a must and he knew Kise wasn’t fond of it. He would always catch him trying to remove it, tugging on it as if it was going to snap apart. There were times Kise tried to bite it off but his attempts cost him a trip to the hospital wing._ _

__It was his job to take care of him, but it seemed his list of failures continue to grow no matter how hard he tried. It was tough on both of them, he realized as they were together as partners._ _

__In the end, they were both at fault._ _

__“Kise, listen to me,” Kasamatsu finally spoke. “This is not something you can ignore and laugh about later on. You know how serious this is? The last time a shifter tried to escape, he was put to death instantly under Akashi’s command. I don’t know how severe this punish will be, but I will put in a few words.” He exhaled and ran a hand through his hair._ _

__“It seems I always make trouble for you, captain.” Kise admitted._ _

__“I think I’m used to that by now.” Kasamatsu agreed lightly and added. “Especially cleaning up after your mess. I swear if you leave crumbs on the couch again-”_ _

__“Hey! That’s not me!” Kise pursed his lips and crossed his arms. “I’m careful all the time, you’re the one who chews like a hippo!”_ _

__Kasamatsu stared at him with wide eyes, looking at Kise stunned. He was a bit flabbergasted, almost wishing he misheard it. “Wait, did you just-did you call me a… a hippo?”_ _

__Kise covered his mouth with his hands, stifling the laugh but it was definitely way too noticeable. “No, I didn’t say anything. Nothing at all.”_ _

__“Oh, so now you’re lying AND calling me a hippo? Why you got some balls there.” Kasamatsu graced him with a smirk and he cracked his knuckles in preparation._ _

__“Oh shit.” The look of horror on Kise’s face was priceless. He immediately bolted off the boxes and landed on the cement floor with grace. “Ha ha! You can’t catch me!”_ _

__With a chuckle, Kasamatsu got off his seat and landed in front of Kise without a problem, but Kise scuttled away before he could even reach him. He heard him howl. “Too slow!”_ _

__“Bring it.”_ _

__It started with a game of tag, Kise dodging at the very moments when Kasamatsu almost caught up to him. The shifter was quick on his feet as he turned and ran around the room, sometimes jumping on top of the cases to throw Kasamatsu off. Kasamatsu easily figured out his plan and tried to corner him, but even he got stooped as Kise took a different route. They both played off each other’s traits, knowing what each other was thinking as they calculated different plans. Both gotten close but never enough for them to call it a win._ _

__Kise’s animated laughs rang in the air as he cascaded through Section 6 without using the stairs as an escape. Kasamatsu saw the little joy in his eyes and cherished the way the shifter curled his lips, free from all worries. After all, Kise deserved a bit of downtime for himself._ _

__With a last burst of energy, Kasamatsu successfully grabbed onto Kise’s arm and tugged him back, stopping both of them in place. “I got you.”_ _

__“Man, looks like you win.” Kise wiped the sweat off his face with his sleeve and cried with a high yelp as Kasamatsu jabbed his side._ _

__“And that’s your punishment.”_ _

__“Ow, that hurts! Gah! Hey-hey I’m sensitive over there!” Kise cringed as he stepped back but Kasamatsu made sure he stayed in place, resuming his jabs at the crying shifter. “Wah! I’m going to die!”_ _

__Kasamatsu stopped and stared at the shifter. “I’m not kidding about this,” The hold on his arm tightened. “Don’t do this again. I understand that this…” He fumbled for the right words. “Isn’t your home and I won’t fault you for that, but it’s not something to make light of. Your life is not a game where you can reset it with a few buttons.”_ _

__“Yeah I get it.” Kise answered but it wasn’t enough for the captain._ _

__“Do you really?” Kasamatsu snapped. “I’m not saying this because it’s in the job description, I’m saying this because I worry for you. Don’t throw your life away when I can only do so much. Come to me if you want to talk and I will listen to every word.” He heard Kise hissed and noticed how hard he was holding onto the shifter. He let go. “…And the guys miss you too so there’s that.”_ _

__He was pulled into Kise’s chest and felt a set of arms surrounding him completely like a mother’s embrace. “Okay,” A fragile voice hovered over his head. “I won’t do it again I promise. I’ll be good from now on. I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.”_ _

__Kasamatsu hummed a reply and relaxed against him, breathing in the scent of spring._ _

__They can do this._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's hard on those two sometimes. Thank you for reading and comments are appreciated!


	5. when he falls apart

“The last one who tried to escape here was put to death. Do you know why? Because I do not tolerate anyone going against my authority. Why should I change my mind about this one in particular, captain?”

“During my time with him, I’ve come to learn that he has many faults. He never thinks of the consequences and makes mistakes, creating disorder and problems. Despite all of that, he has proven his worth to Kaijou. He quickly learns from his wrongdoings, and effectively a team player. He follows orders-”

“But he disobeyed a direct order from you, did he not?”

Kasamatsu agreed with a tilt of his head. “He did. I made it clear to him that this situation won’t happen again.”

Akashi hummed in thought and looked at Kise standing next to the captain. Kise stood there quietly with his head bowed to the floor as if he was small and unnoticeable in this small room. “Is that so? Loyalty is hard to come by these days. One day, they obey your every word and the next, they run wild without a care.”

He walked and fronted Kise. He tilted the shifter’s chin up until they saw eye to eye. “Pay attention.”

“Yes, sir.” Kise replied. No hint of defiance, only obedience.

“Tell me, do you want me to end your life?”

Pupils widened.

“I can do it without any pain if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“No, sir.”

“The last one asked for death. I granted his wish so if you seek release then please speak your mind.”

Kise simply shook his head, the golden locks hung over his face. “I don’t. I want to stay here.”

“A fine choice.” Akashi smiled and turned around, walking to his desk to take a seat. “Mayuzumi, bind him outside to a pole. No food or water for five days.”

“Akashi-” Kasamatsu interrupted but he clamped his mouth shut as Akashi raised his hand. 

“I wasn’t finished, captain.” Akashi stated and Kasamatsu remained silent. “I do apologize since he is unable to join your missions but punishment is necessary. Five days is enough for him to think about what he has done, and I’m doing him a favor by granting him the view of outside.” He looked at Mayuzumi and the snake shifter nodded, taking Kise by the arm.

Kise let himself be taken away without a fight, but the clear shock was evident. He looked at the captain and bent his head, revealing a delicate smile. “Sorry, captain… Looks like I won’t be useful to you for some time.” 

He was gone.

To be outside during this time of year and with no rain in weeks, Kise won’t be able to survive for that long. The heat was unbearable and water was a necessity if you don’t keep yourself hydrated.

“I will notify your superior of the situation and you’re thinking too hard. This is a learning experience for him, surely you agree.” Akashi stated. “I extend my leniency because I sense there is a lot of potential waiting to be discovered and I hope you will bring it out of him.”

“…Yes I understand. Thank you sir, for your generosity.” Kasamatsu carefully kept his composure as he politely bowed to Akashi. 

Akashi returned with a nod. “There’s nothing to thank me for. You may leave now.”

Kasamatsu bowed one last time and left the room. He returned to Kaijou’s base and walked back to his room, ignoring the worried stares and his friends calling out his name along the way, but he didn’t respond. If they got the hint then they should leave him alone for a while.

He shut the door behind him and laid his back against the cold surface. He breathed in deeply and cursed himself for allowing Kise’s punishment to happen. What could he do but to accept it? Akashi was not a man to mess with, he heard many times from his teammates. His words were absolute, after all. His fists tightly clenched together, feeling the slight pain of his nails digging into his palm until he knew they broke skin.

How can he be a captain when he cannot protect those close to him? 

He punched the wall until he saw red against his knuckles. The surface cracked into broken pieces, leaving a small hole and scattered chunks mixed with red and white fell to the ground.

~*~

The first day of Kise’s punishment began. Kobari gave the team their assignment and sent them out to the field as soon as possible. Kasamatsu was already dressed in his uniform, with his protective gear over his body and weapons stashed in his hidden pockets. His boots touched the dry dirt as he left Kaijou with his teammates following behind, also readied in their own set uniforms.

The sun’s intensity hit them hard and the air made it a pain to breathe. 

_It’s a good day to build your stamina and see if you can survive under extreme conditions once you’ve reached your destination. Take note and drink plenty of water. You have received your coordinates so get it done and I expect a report from you._

Those were his superior’s last words before Kasamatsu headed out. He shifted his cap to block the sun from his eyes.

The group followed as they came to the pole where Kise was tied to.

“You guys go on ahead, I’ll catch up in a few.” Kasamatsu stated to his group as his eyes didn’t leave Kise.

The rest looked at each other as they reached an understanding and nodded to their captain.

“Don’t fall behind.”

“We’re not picking up your corpse if you decide to pass out along the way.”

“See you later, captain!”

Kasamatsu grinned at them. “Better hope I don’t catch any of you stragglers on the way.”

When he was alone, he saw how Kise was tied against the pole while his arms spanned out completely as if he was crucified, the ropes bounded tightly around his wrists and legs, and covered in a sheen of sweat.

Kise looked up surprisingly, but softening with a sense of relief. “What a day we’re having. It’s been a while since I’ve felt the sun against my skin.”

Kasamatsu felt his stomach churned uncomfortably. “Kise-”

“It feels kind of nice…” A droplet of sweat slid down the shifter’s chin. “Though I might get a bad sunburn after this.”

“Kise…” The captain’s face falter a bit and moved his hand over Kise’s cheek without a thought.

The shifter gave a satisfied sigh. “Mmm, you’re always warm. I’ll be fine, Kasamatsucchi. A bit of sun won’t kill me, y’know?”

He pulled his hand back. “You can’t keep this up for five days.” His brows furrowed into deep worry.

A laugh. “That’s not a lot. It could be worse.” 

“It’s my fault for not saying anything.” Kasamatsu bit his bottom lip. “You shouldn’t be here.”

“There you go again, always finding some fault in yourself. No one argues against Akashi, right? You’re the one who told me that. “

He was right about that. “I-” 

But Kise cut him off. “Captain, believe in me when I say I’ll be fine. I’m a lot stronger than you think. Go back to the team, I’m sure they’re falling apart already.” 

_But I need you with me._

“I know it must be boring without me around but when I come back, I’ll make sure to spend all of my time with you.” Kise lightly said and gave him a playful wink. It doesn’t get Kise any brownie points as Kasamatsu flicked his forehead in reply.

“Hey! You big meanie!” 

“Dumbass, who would want to spend time with you?” Kasamatsu fumed and Kise laughed.

~*~

When day two of Kise’s punishment started, the weather had not changed at all with its ridiculous temperature and lack of rain. No winds blowing in his face or any sign of the heat wave coming to an end. A day like today had to be considered a dead day.

Kasamatsu came to visit again while the team was assigned on another mission, and he didn’t miss the sounds of a hungry stomach growling in desperation.

“When I get back, I’m stealing your food and you’re not stopping me. I’ll take a steak or a juicy burger, top it all with fries and add some mashed potatoes in there. Maybe if you whip up some fried pig, I’m down with that too.” 

Kasamatsu chuckled. “Okay, you cow.”

Kise gasped dramatically. “You’re still a hippo!”

They both laughed in unison until Kise had a coughing fit. “Ah… my throat’s a little dry.”

“I’m sorry, if only I can get you some water.” Kasamatsu wasn’t allowed to, in fact, no one had permission to keep Kise fed and hydrated. Akashi’s orders. Even if someone tried to help Kise, he or she would face consequences and Kasamatsu doesn’t need to know what exactly.

“Well, as long as you’re here, I don’t need anything else.” Kise stated casually. He grimaced when another rumbling sound came from his stomach.

Kasamatsu raised his brow and shook his head. “Don’t be silly, you need to get something in your system.”

“And you need to get going before the team really thinks you’re dead.”

“Don’t change the subject.” Kasamatsu knew Kise had this tendency of doing so, always trying to keep the conversation light despite the constant worrying Kasamatsu does every hour because he was helpless to do anything; he could only watch him afar and see the grim reminder on Kise’s face as the punishment continued.

“I’m not, I don’t want them thinking you slacked off.” Kise smiled at him and received a ruffled of his dirty hair which Kasamatsu didn’t mind doing.

~*~

Day three began a turn for the worse. Kasamatsu saw the once healthy skin transformed into an angry crimson of burns all over Kise’s body. His face sagged with exhaustion as he looked at Kasamatsu, eyes losing the life in them. Kasamatsu took note of the visible rope burns on his wrists. They weren’t there yesterday, the marks looked as if they were cut deeply, and he finally understood. Kise did this to himself.  
“Sorry…” Kise rasped out while his head fell forward, a waterfall of yellow hovering his face. “I don’t think-I don’t think I can do this. Can you get me out of here?” His voice fell into a begging tone but his lips still held with a sense of humor.

“You know I can’t do that.” 

“Captain, please?” Kise asked again and his hands gripped into a closed fist. His arms moved against the ropes, irritating the welts further.

“Stop it right now.” Kasamatsu commanded with a snap, not wanting to see them get any worse. Kise was already in pain, he didn’t need more of it. 

He parted the messy yellow hair and smoothed it behind the ears. He watched Kise lessened to a halt, the silence drifting between them. Kasamatsu swallowed the small lump in his throat, already losing the words he wanted to say, and all he received was an affectionate smile.

“Stay for a while longer.” 

And he stayed, enough to keep each other company until time parted them once more.

~*~

“Listen to my voice, okay? Pay attention to me.” Kasamatsu held Kise’s face in his hands, cupping his cheeks as he tried to soothe him from the pain. Kise revealed how his headaches felt like hammers against his skull and his body aching all over. His hunger gnawing his insides and he smelled of piss. The heat continued its torment as the day reached its peak.

“Come on, you can do this. You said it was only five days, nothing can get worse than this, right?” Kasamatsu whispered. “Where did all that confidence go? You’re Kaijou’s ace, right? Giving up wasn’t an option.” He wasn’t getting any response, only hearing the painful whimpers.

His hands moved from Kise’s cheeks to the crown of his head, slowly massaging the scalp in small rotations. “Just one more day. You will get through this, okay?”

He then heard a few mutters from Kise’s lips. “Come again?”

“I hate you.”

“Do you really?” Kasamatsu quietly asked as he continued his ministrations, thinking the heat has gotten to the young blond.

Kise repeated the sentence and this time Kasamatsu wasn’t sure if he was actually serious.

~*~

The punishment was finally over. Moriyama and Hayakawa came to release Kise from the pole and quickly took him to the infirmary. Kise had already passed out by the time the two came for him. Kasamatsu went to the hospital room and stayed with him as the doctor tended to his health. When finished, the doctor wrote out a detailed report of his condition and told him that Kise needed a lot of rest to regain his strength. Food and liquids were to be consumed in small portions to allow his stomach to digest normally or he would throw it all up. He lost a bit of weight but it can be easily remedied with the right nutrition. All of the burns were taken care of and would heal over time and given antibiotics as a precaution.

It was only a matter of time before Kise was back on his feet.

The ticking of the clock passed midnight and Kasamatsu fell asleep on the edge of the shifter’s bed. He slept until late in the morning as he felt shaky hand over his head. “Mmm…” Kasamatsu stirred between his arms and tilted his head slightly to see a retreating hand.

“Good morning or is it a good night?” Kise said wearily.

Kasamatsu glanced at the wall clock. “It’s a quarter pass three. Go back to sleep, you need plenty of rest so you can heal.”

“And what about you? Shouldn’t you be sleeping in your own room?” Kise retorted.

Kasamatsu yawned and sat back against his seat. He cracked his neck to the side, figuring he shouldn’t sleep in that position for a long amount of time. “Probably but I fell asleep since looking after you can be quite the task.”

The shifter crinkled his eyes. “Wow, you did that for me? You’re really amazing.”

“And I thought you hated me.” Kasamatsu maintained a calm disposition. 

“Eh? When did I say that?” The poor shifter looked distraught.

“You said it yesterday. Don’t you remember?”

Kise shook his head too quickly. “Wh-what?! No, no-I never said that! I would never… I don’t even hate you, I like you, captain!” He embarrassingly waved his hand. “Don’t listen to me, I was not in the right mind at the time. The heat gets to you and an empty stomach too… please don’t be upset.”

Kasamatsu didn’t know what to say. He merely blinked, feeling a bit apprehensive about the whole thing. “You like me?” He replied very slowly.

“Yeah, you’re pretty cool to be around with. You’re also caring and gentle, why everyone likes you, captain. No wonder why they all look up to you.”

For some reason, why was he expecting a different answer?

“I see. Well, that’s good to know.” Kasamatsu responded and got up from his seat. He made his way to the door and ignored the sinking feeling in his chest. “I’ll be back later to check on you so get some sleep. Good night, Kise.” He left quickly and disappeared from the room, ignoring the cries calling out to him.

He was thinking too much. It was ridiculous to even suggest it and here of all places. He continued his trek down the halls until he reached the empty gym room. He went to the back, behind the set of treadmills, and stood in front of the black punching bag. With a cry, he kicked the bag before following up with a punch.

Every contact he made, he tried to make sense of what this feeling was. How stupid of him to think of this as a possibility when they lived in different worlds. They were teammates, meant to be partners and covered each other backs when necessary, building their world around trust and companionship.

Camaraderie, right?

With all of his might, he landed one final kick and the bag fell to its side with a thump. He stood there panting, sweat dampening his shirt along with the numbing feeling in his legs. He wiped the moisture off his face and steadied his breathing, but he couldn’t get Kise out of his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments and kudos are appreciated! You can find me on Tumblr: heartlessblu


	6. when he refuses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Change of POV for this chapter.

After Kise was discharged from the infirmary, Kasamatsu spent his time helping him get back on his feet. He made sure Kise exercised daily to regain his muscle strength despite receiving complaints about the captain pushing him too hard, but Kasamatsu showed him by adding another fifty push-ups and five more laps around the track if he wished to continue whining about it. 

Kise tried to wiggle his way out of them but his futile attempts proven a failure. Nothing could change the captain’s mind once he was dead set on it.

At least the food wasn’t a huge deal. Kise soon got back to eating regular meals, his appetite surprised Kasamatsu as he saw Kise rummaged through their own fridge, for starters. Kise wasn’t kidding when he said he was going to steal all of his food. He even stole those small prepared lunches that were set aside which he got his ass kicked for it. With a promise, he won’t do it again.

Passing days turned to weeks, everything went back to a set routine, but for the shifter, his days felt out of place.

He knew something seemed off because Kasamatsu wasn’t around lately, as if he went up and disappeared without telling him. There were days when he didn’t come back for a long periods of time, and the nights spent in their room became a deafening silence. Kise passed the time sitting and waiting for him to come home and greet him a ‘welcome back’.

Kasamatsu never did.

But that one night, Kise pretended to sleep. He would open an eye, looking at the silhouette of Kasamatsu’s shadow getting ready for bed. With a dip in the mattress and some shuffling between the covers, Kise didn’t utter a word to him, thinking he ruined something between them. He chose to stay quiet and tried to sleep for the remainder of the night, but by the time Kise shut his eyes, Kasamatsu left his bed without saying anything.

There were times they would see each other, especially around their fellow allies, and bid a ‘hello’ like nothing happened. The air between them shifted. The captain’s face lacked not of a leader but almost a stranger to him. It bothered him, in fact, it scared him. He preferred Kasamatsu yelling at him again or offering comforting words when he fell to his lowest, but his world re-started again, living alone until he told himself that he couldn’t continue like this.

~*~

“The captain? Hmm, I heard he’s already out on a mission.”

“By himself?” Kise asked in disbelief. He never stayed behind whenever the captain went out. “Do you know where he went?”

“I don’t know but Kobori probably has the answer so he’s the man to ask.” Moriyama replied and rested a hand on Kise’s shoulder, adding a bit of comfort. “Don’t worry, Yukio worked solo way before you even arrived so it’s not a surprise really. That’s how he sharpened his skills, if you asked me.”

“I never knew, I guess it’s my first time hearing about this.” Kise mildly replied, still not completely convinced. “I’ll go talk to Kobori then.”

He visited his superior’s office and asked him straight in the face about Kasamatsu’s tasks and why he wasn’t out there with him, but he was stunned when he found out it was the captain’s decision to take them.

“I asked him if he needed any back-up but he refused and told me it wasn’t necessary.” Kobari released a huff. “I trust the captain’s skills in handling himself on his own but I’m also a bit surprised.” Kobari eyed at Kise curiously. “I suggested to bring you along but he declined and headed out without much to say.”

Kise frowned, unsure of what was going on. It didn’t seemed to be Kasamatsu’s style especially when he was always partnered with him. Did he do something wrong?

“If there’s something going on between you two…” Kobori’s gaze hardened as he looked at Kise suspiciously. “I suggest you fix it soon. I don’t know what happened but I rather not have complications developing on my team, you understand?”

“Yes, sir. Don’t worry, I’ll sort this out soon.” Kise nodded before questioning. “Do you know where he went off to?”

“Good and he’s around the grasslands, you’ve been here before actually…” With a few clicks on the computer, Kobori pulled up the information on screen, the red dot blinking against the map highlighting the green terrain. “He’s not far off and should be back-”

“Thanks!” Kise saluted the man and bolted out the door, ignoring Kobori’s voice telling him to stop. He passed a few officers along the way as they wondered where he was off in a hurry.

“I’m going find him, that’s what! Can’t let Kasamatsucchi-” He didn’t watch where he was going as he turned a right down a hallway and bumped into someone. He fell back with a cry but a hand quickly held onto him before he landed on his ass.

“Naka… Nakamura?” Kise regained his stance. “Thanks, sorry about that. Didn’t know you were there.”

“Watch where you’re going next time. We don’t any accidents waiting to happen.” Nakamura lifted his glasses. 

“Yeah, silly me.” Kise replied sheepishly and rubbed the back of his head embarrassingly. “I have to go actually.”

“Kise, I didn’t give you permission to leave.” Kobori called out from behind, his face look of complete disappointment. “Your orders are to stay here and since you seemed to be in a running mood… Nakamura, take him to the track and have him exercise his legs more.”

“Why…” The shifter’s shoulders faltered ever so slightly, but he knew he was asking for it if he disobeyed Kobori. Forget it, he would wait. 

“Come on, Kise. Let’s get going. We’re going to put those legs to good use.” Nakamura turned and walked in the direction of the track while Kise followed behind, his mind filled with heavy thoughts.

Maybe this was a good idea, Kise thought as he ran around the track field, his legs feeling the burn with every step against the pavement. Ten laps might be a little too much but Nakamura didn’t seemed to be in the mood to bargain with.

After finishing four laps so far, he still couldn’t figure it out.

Before he could even sift through his thoughts properly once more, he heard a beating of sneakers running up from behind. The familiar pants and running pace startled him as he came to a slow, turning his head slightly to see his own captain next to him, sporting a white tee and blue sweats. 

“Captain…” Kise quietly spoke as he came to a full stop and Kasamatsu caught up to him running in place. “What’re you doing here? I thought you were…”

“Kobori told me you were here so I thought I’d join you.” He paused. “And I don’t believe your ten laps are over.” Kasamatsu said as he resumed his running, leaving a very confused Kise behind.

“Wait a second, hold on!” Kise followed him but every time he got closer, Kasamatsu pulled away few paces ahead. “We have to talk, I need to talk to you.”

_Look at me. Damn it, listen to me, just don’t leave me behind again._

He hurried and pushed his legs forward until he reached out, grabbing onto Kasamatsu’s shirt and pulling him around until he was facing him. 

“Tell me what I did wrong. You said you’d listen to me if I wanted to talk to you, but you were never there when I needed you.” His gripped tightened, afraid his captain would pull away. “Was it-was it something I said because whatever I said, I didn’t mean it! You know me, right? I’m bad at playing jokes and-and… horrible at insulting you.” Kise shuddered a breath as he tried to hide the trembling sensation in his hands. He can’t crumble like this.

He spotted no change in Kasamatsu’s expression and hated not knowing what he was thinking.  
“Did I not meet your standards? If you want me to change then I’ll be more compliant. I’ll do anything you ask. I’ll even go to the arena and fight the others if you want, is that what you want?” His legs gave up and fell to his knees while grasping Kasamatsu’s hand. He won’t let go of him, he absolutely won’t.

“I don’t care what it is but don’t hate me.” Kise whispered and laid his head against the blue pants. He sensed Kasamatsu went still before he lowered himself with an arm around Kise’s back.

“Sheesh, don’t start crying on me now.” Kasamatsu replied lightly and stroke the mop of yellow hair. “I don’t hate you. I care for you too much, but the blame is on me. I left you without thinking of the consequences.”

Kise tightened his grip and laid his head comfortably again Kasamatsu’s chest. His heartbeat echoed into his ear, calming him every second of the way.

“I wanted some time alone,” Kasamatsu explained. “I needed to think but I didn’t know you would be affected by this.” 

“But it doesn’t explain why you never said anything to me. Like you were running away from something.” Kise exasperated and bang his fist against Kasamatsu’s thigh in frustration, suddenly remembering the day when Kasamatsu left the infirmary in a hurry. His captain never shown such a face before.

What was it he said to him back then?

_“You like me?”_

_“Yeah, you’re pretty cool to be around with. You’re also caring and gentle, why everyone likes you, captain. No wonder why they all look up to you.”_

“Was it that?” It was slowly coming to him. “Because I said…” I like you. “O-oh.”

Of course he liked him. Kasamatsu was more than the average cool guy, he was everything to him. He was strong and dedicated to his work, also aggressive but beneath that tough guy approach, he had a gentle heart. Back then, he couldn’t tell him all that, it would’ve been embarrassing!

“And you left when I said that… you were expecting something else, right?” He looked up, baring a hint of a smile, a growing fondness as he knew what this man wanted. “I get it now, I was silly to think that it was a dream.” He wanted to hold him, but Kasamatsu backed away.

“ _Kasamatsucchi-_ ” The warmth in his eyes left him.

“No,” Kasamatsu snapped and countered. “And I told you not to call me that.” 

Kise stood up as Kasamatsu was in a comfortable position away from him. The realization became apparent and clear to both of them. “Captain, please.” He pleaded.

“I said no, simple as that. It will never happen. Whatever you’re feeling, forget about it. You’re here to do your job while I do mine. You’re no different than the others I’ve met.”

Kise let out a nervous laugh because he can see all the lies written on Kasamatsu’s face. “You can’t say that. What about my feelings?” He raised a hand to his own heart. “You can’t make that decision for me.” 

Before he can close the distance between them, Kasamatsu took out a gun from behind and held it straight at him. 

He came to a complete halt and tightened his lips. His eyes flickered at the weapon as it stirred the nightmares he can never forget.

A pitiful laughter rang out. “I lied. I hated you because you were there...” Kise admitted in a soft tone and struggled to put on a smile. “I wanted to forget but how can I when you took our home away and killed our friends and families because we resisted. And now we’re here trapped and held against our will, fighting against one another and used until you’re satisfied. I despised you for that…” Kise closed his eyes and touched the metal band around his neck. 

“But you treated me like I was part of you guys, like a family almost. It’s kind of fucked up if you think about it but this team… well, you actually-you’re different and I thought if I stayed by your side, that everything will be okay.”

He felt his eyes watered and quickly wiped them away with the back of his hand. “That this is the only happiness I can have. You may not believe it but I always liked you, captain.”

“Kise, that… this-this isn’t normal. I’m sorry but you can’t think this will ever work. You’re mistaken.”

“What is normal then?!” Kise screamed at him. “You don’t even understand the meaning of that, none of you don’t!”

A shot resonated into the air.

Kise felt a little sting on his shoulder and found a small dart when he pulled it out. His eyes focused on Kasamatsu putting his gun away but he fought to keep them open as he felt the urge to sleep taking over him. He stumbled as his legs weakened and fell to his side, desperately not to let things end this way.

“This doesn’t change anything…” He lastly saw, what may be a tinge of regret on Kasamatsu’s face before he succumbed to the dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, comments and kudos are appreciated!


	7. when he accepts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took way too long, ugh... how frustrating.

“Is everything alright?” Nakamura caught up to Kasamatsu, looking worried at both the captain and the sleeping shifter. “You went a little overboard with the gun there, don’t you think?”

“I did what was necessary.” Kasamatsu put the weapon away. He wasn’t sure if his actions were considered the most efficient way of handling the situation, but he didn’t want to hear another word from Kise. It was best to leave it at it is and possibly request a transfer, if Kobori would allow it. He would be assigned to a new partner and Kise wouldn’t need to stay in Kaijo any longer. “Help me get him up.” He ordered and Nakamura followed as they both carried Kise out of the track. Kasamatsu looked over at Kise’s face and knew that he was sorry.

Sorry that this situation grew into something that shouldn’t happen, sorry that he couldn’t reciprocate Kise’s feelings because Kise deserved someone better.

“You’re our captain, whatever your decision is, we’ll be fine with it. We’re not going to hate you or think of you differently.” Nakamura broke the silence. 

“What’re you talking about?” Kasamatsu raised a brow.

“Well, it wasn’t that hard to guess what you guys were talking about. Hell, even some of the teammates thought you guys had a thing for each other. You guys fought a lot but still…” Nakamura grinned at him but he received an intense stare that sent shivers down his spine.

“There is nothing going on between us.” Kasamatsu retorted.

“Of course not, you keep telling yourself that.” Nakamura said and shuddered at another glare more deadly than before.

.

“This is a bit too soon.” Kobori looked up from Kasamatsu’s transfer sheet with a light frown. “You know I value Kise’s work in the field with you. He made great improvements each months. He’s quick on foot and supports the team with his strength and intellect. The results have proven greater than the previous partners you had. None of them can compare to what I’m seeing now.” 

“I know, sir.” If Kasamatsu allowed this to continued, he and Kise would fall apart. He couldn’t risk that happening and to the team.

“Why the sudden change? What happened between you two?” Kobori placed the paper down and folded his hands together on the desk, studying the captain with high interest.

“He’s sporadic…” Kasamatsu attempted to explain. “Quick to change and a high probability of him falling back down to square one. He would lose focus and dedication. What you see him now, he won’t be that for long.” But he knew he was wrong, they were lies built on lies.

Kobori sighed, looking unsure about the next step. “You understand you will be given potential shifters to evaluate and I cannot guarantee they’ll be like the others or like _Kise_.” He heavily emphasized on that name. 

With a nod, Kasamatsu was willing to take it, but it sounded strange coming from his mouth. “Then it’s my job to bring out their potential. I don’t know what will happen but make no mistake, one of them will stand out.” It tasted sour. 

“I know you will do your job well but I want to mention this to you. Kise came to me after you took on that solo mission. He looked very worried and sprinted out of my office when I told him where you were. I said to him before, whatever was going on between the two of you, it had to be fixed so assuming why you’re here now you two didn’t.”

Kasamatsu didn’t speak. He didn’t think Kise would go after him, it wasn’t necessary.

“I am not easily fooled.” Kobori relaxed and put the sheet in the outgoing box. “I will notify this to the higher-ups, but…” His eyes glowered. “He adores you, I can see that much.”

“Sir-”

Kobori shook his head. “I will say this, I believe this is a big mistake you’re making. If you forgotten, I was the one who decided Kise would be the best fit for you from the start so I want you two to talk it out and see where it will go. I have no qualms about it if you two decide to further your relationship, as long as you can guarantee what I give you can be completed without a problem.”

Was this Kobori’s form of acceptance? Kasamatsu wondered. “I understand, sir. I will talk to him about this.”

“Good, you are dismissed.” Kobori lastly said.

Kasamatsu left the room and headed back to his own where Kise was sleeping. Why did he even put him back there? Maybe he was too used to the fact that his room was _theirs_ and he didn’t know where else to put him.

Every step he took, it felt like cement holding him down but he continued on, mentally preparing himself what was going to come next. When he finally reached his room, he opened it and went into the small kitchen to make himself a pot of hot coffee.

The smell of it filled the room as he poured himself a cup. No sugar, just the way he liked it. He walked into the bedroom and settled in the chair next to the bed where Kise rested, the heat from the cup warmed his chilled hands nicely. He took another sip before he placed it on the top of the table next to him.

Kasamatsu hinted a smirk as he noticed Kise wasn’t snoring like he always did or the subtle drooling from the corner of his lips. As if he couldn’t see how obvious it was to know Kise wasn’t sleeping. “Oi, I know you’re awake.”

The body froze and the plot of bright hair turned until Kasamatsu caught Kise’s surprised look, startling his own heart in the process. The messy bed hair and glassy eyes done him in.

“How’d you know I wasn’t sleeping?”

“You snoring is horrendous and you tend to drool a lot when you sleep so it was pretty obvious.”

“Oh…” A bit embarrassment hovered the shifter’s face and ended with that. Kasamatsu noticed Kise looking to the side and back at him. He knew something was bothering Kise.

“We should talk.”

“Can we talk?”

They both said at the same time.

“Oh… well, you go ahead. Captain’s first.” Kise urged on as he sat upright on the bed so his legs can dangle freely over.

“Fine.” Here goes nothing. “I put in a transfer request today.” Kasamatsu started and glared when Kise was about to speak over him. He saw those sad puppy eyes, as if his own little world was about to end with one sentence. “I don’t know if it’ll go through so there is hope for you but that’s not what I wanted to talk to you about. What I really wanted to tell you is, well… Kobori told me-well us, about fixing this problem we have.”

“It’s not a problem, it never was one!” Kise cried out, startling Kasamatsu in his seat. “We can make it work, it’s not like we’ll get in trouble if that bothers you a lot.”

No, that wasn’t it actually. It bothered Kasamatsu that Kaijo was there when Kise’s home was under attack. They were there as his men were sent out to do their jobs: capture the shifters and bring them back. Over time, the shifters died and Kaijo’s task was to find more of them to increase the numbers. 

It wouldn’t make sense for Kise to develop feelings for him because he took everything away and his people he knew died in the process. Anyone with a right mind would hate Kaijo and sought revenge. As Kasamatsu stated before, they came from different worlds, they cannot make this work.

“Stop it,” Kise shot out and gripped one of Kasamatsu’s hand tightly. “You’re thinking too hard on this when you know I…”

“Don’t say it.” Kasamatsu growled. “Don’t you dare fucking say it.” He needed to leave, get some fresh air and sit somewhere quiet where he doesn’t have to be around the insufferable male. He stood up but Kise’s strength overpowered him as he pulled Kasamatsu back on the chair.

Kise stood up from the bed while he still held onto the captain. “I like you- perhaps I love you is the better term, alright? How many times do I have to tell you that? You can disagree all you want but I’m not going anywhere… well, I can’t really anyway.”

“How can you say that after everything?” Kasamatsu looked distraught, hearing him say those words so naturally. “You can’t expect being in a relationship would fix all the wrongs we caused. It won’t give you a sense of normalcy-”

Kise moaned and disagreed with a shake of his head. “I don’t think any of us has a sense of what’s normal, but I’m willing to make this work. I know this isn’t what you want but maybe it’s time to live in the present and stop worrying about everything else.”

“Shit,” Kasamatsu grimaced. “You’re asking a lot, you understand? This isn’t something you find in some cliché romance movie, you can’t expect this to be perfect in the end.” Kasamatsu tried to not let the anger overcome him and felt the subtle heat growing from the way Kise rubbed a comforting gesture over his knuckles. It calmed him down just a little. 

“You’re right, I don’t but I won’t stop until you agree with me. That you won’t deny your feelings and accept this small happiness that we have. I don’t have anyone else except you. You’re the only one I want to be with.” Kise tightened his grip. 

The strain in Kise’s voice stung Kasamatsu. Kise was begging him to say ‘yes’. Kasamatsu knew his feelings were still there for Kise and didn’t change one bit. They never did. He should be holding Kise in his arms and see what he was missing, but an invisible weight kept him rooted to his seat. He lowered his eyes to the floor unsurely.

“Hey, hey…” Kise kneeled until he met steel blue eyes while both of his hands were now wrapped around Kasamatsu’s. “I’m serious about this. What will it take for you to say you want this too?”

“I can’t offer you anything.” Kasamatsu lifted a hand and touched the collar around Kise’s neck. “Not even this. I hold the title as Captain but I can’t even do something as simple as giving you what you always wanted.” 

“We’ve established that much from the beginning. There are things in this world we can’t really do.”

“Then what can we do?” Kasamatsu asked as he looked at Kise and saw determination. 

“Hmm, you can kiss me, for starters.” Kise smiled brightly, but a hint of coy. 

The answer left the captain stunned. 

“I know you want to.” Kise leaned forward until their foreheads bumped against each other. “And I really want to kiss you too, like really badly.” He uttered lowly as his chilly nose carefully skimmed against the captain’s while a hand lightly cupped the side of Kasamatsu’s face.

Kasamatsu’s face grew slightly red as he pursed his lips tightly and damn, Kise was killing him intentionally and not in a bad way too. “What if I don’t?”

“Don’t lie to yourself.” Kise responded. He lowered his hand and skimmed his fingers through the ends of Kasamatsu’s hair.

“I don’t think I can do this.”

“Trust in me and yourself. You have nothing to lose.”

“And if I lose you, what then?”  


“You won’t because you got my back and I got yours. Losing is not an option for us.”

“How can you accept this so freely?” Kasamatsu got his answer as Kise simply shrugged. It wouldn’t change anything.

“If shit happens, I’m going to kick your ass so hard, you’ll be begging for a transfer.” It wasn’t a threat, not really anyway.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Kasamatsu gave in and hesitantly bumped his own lips against Kise’s. A sudden jolt of pleasure sprung throughout his body and he heard a pleasant gasp coming from the shifter as a result. Kasamatsu parted first with a shuddering breath and looked at Kise smiling at him sweetly before the captain went in for another, igniting a fire between the two. They explored with slow movements, figuring out what felt best for the both of them. A little clumsy on Kasamatsu’s part, he was even a little nervous because he wasn’t an expert at kissing but Kise helped him along the way and he followed.

It felt really nice once Kasamatsu got the hang of it. He even allowed Kise to pull him forward until he straddled over Kise’s legs while his hands wrapped around Kise’s neck. Their kisses deepened as they both tasted each other with enthusiasm. Kasamatsu felt a tongue exploring his mouth and several moans managed to escape from his lips. He mimicked Kise and intertwined his own against Kise’s slick appendage.

When they pulled back after a shortage of air, Kise rested on Kasamatsu’s chest and long arms wrapped around him comfortably without a word to be said. Kasamatsu sensed the small curl of the blond’s mouth against his neck.

“Mmm, captain?” Kise shuffled under Kasamatsu’s shirt and rubbed small circles around his back.

“What is it?” Kasamatsu asked, feeling relaxed under the small touches.

“Can I…”

“Yes?”

“Can I shove my dick inside-Ow!” Kise yelped as he protected himself and cowered. 

Kasamatsu smacked him over the head and added another before he scoffed, relinquishing his seat off of Kise. The obvious embarrassment coated the captain’s face so much. He couldn’t even look at Kise, let alone a serious one. He distracted himself with his slightly warm cup of coffee and drank most of it, enjoying the bitter taste in his throat. 

“You keep that up and I’ll chop your manhood right off.” Kasamatsu finished and Kise squirmed in his bed.

“Did you know one of the reasons I fell in love with you was because you’re easily embarrassed when you get teased? I find that really cute, Kasamatsucchi.” Kise added but he quickly scrambled out of the way and bolted right out of the bedroom before Kasamatsu could land a hardcover book right on his face.

“I-I do not!” Kasamatsu huffed and followed after him. 

Kise opened the door and stood outside facing him. “I like the way you run too, when you get all sweaty and hot. It gets my blood going!” He ran down the hall.

“You’re ridiculous, I swear! You’re going to pay for it, you ass!” Kasamatsu chased after the running blond, hoping no one heard Kise because he doesn’t have one ounce of shame on him.

Along the way, he passed by a few of his trainees both looking at Kise and Kasamatsu with shock and amusement. Kise continuously founded ways to rile up the captain. He spouted things about the captain’s eyes and how beautiful they look when serious and menacing. He even mentioned how he _loved_ the way Kasamatsu handled with the weapons, the way he caressed the barrels and cleaned them in such a sensual manner. He couldn’t help but felt so turned on.

Kise really knew how to lay one on him.

Kasamatsu found himself in the cafeteria panting and his eyes wandered around for the bright mop of hair. Many familiar eyes were on him, even Moriyama was waving at him and pointing a finger below the table. One could hear the loud ‘ouch’ from under it and the accidental rattled of the table while Moriyama simply laughed and muttered something incoherently. 

He walked over to them.

“Yo captain! Fancy seeing you here? Heard some wild stuff out there, is everything okay?” Moriyama wiggled his eyebrows at him, but his face fell into a crestfallen look. He heard the crack of Kasamatsu’s knuckles and immediately removed himself from his seat, stepping away from the angry captain while bidding a small goodbye to Kise.

“You know…” Kasamatsu said when Moriyama was gone and took Moriyama’s seat. He focused at the few empty tables and chairs in front of him, even bidding a silent nod at the young recruits passing by while Kise stayed under the table quietly. At least Kise wasn’t running away anymore. “Sometimes I think you enjoy getting the attention, gets you all happy and shit. You’re a loud mouth at times and wild enough to drive us crazy. You have bad habits like snoring and hogging all the covers at night and we can’t forget your ridiculous appetite for food.”

Kise remained silent but still under his little cover. 

“I can go on, but I’ll spare you the pain. Despite all of that, I still find you endearing at times. Even I fell in…” Kasamatsu exhaled a nervous breath. “Love with you.”

Kise popped his head out from the table and settled over Kasamatsu’s lap, staring with wide eyes. “R-really?”

“Tch, I’m not saying it again.” Kasamatsu murmured as he averted his gaze. 

“Kasamatsucchi! I love you-EH?!” Kise sprung out of his hiding place happily, and Kasamatsu took it to his advantage and wrestled him into submission. Kasamatsu pulled him down and grinded his fist into the shifter’s head while an arm kept the flailing male in place. Kise’s painful cries rang throughout the entire cafeteria.

“This is your punishment too, y’know? For your insubordination.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I won’t do it again, I promise!”

“It doesn’t sound so promising.”

“I promise I’ll be quiet about it! I won’t say them again, cross my heart and hope to die!”

“Is it?” 

“Ack!” The whimpers filled the air. “Really! I swear!”

“Tch, what am I going to do with you?” Kasamatsu said softly and rolled his eyes. He added a light touch of his lips against the mane of rich yellow and patted the area gently, flattening the strands of hair. “Stop acting like a baby.” Kasamatsu released him and Kise returned with a pout, but soon perked up when everyone hollered and whistled.

Kasamatsu glanced at everyone’s excitement and forgot he was in a public place. “Great, now everybody knows about us.”

“Eh, I’m sure a few already had some idea.” Kise pointed at the two to their left. “Like them, see how he just gave money to that guy? I think he just won a bet.”

Kasamatsu saw and sat up without a word. He left the cafeteria groaning to himself while Kise fell right in place next to him, matching his pace step by step. 

“So what now?”

“Now? You’re going to get yourself cleaned up before you dirty the bed again. You reek of sweat, no offense.”

“Huh, really?” Kise gave a whiff of himself. “Why not, wanna join me?”

Kasamatsu almost tripped and glared at Kise. “Do you have a death wish?”

“Wah, just kidding!” Kise skipped ahead and turned, showing off a bit of confidence in his stance. “Though I wouldn’t mind having your hands on me.” He even had the nerve to lick the upper part of his lips seductively before he scurried away like a frightened mouse. 

No doubt, Kasamatsu was ready to give another chase and kick Kise right off his high-and-mighty throne. 

It was a start.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, comments and kudos are appreciated! You can find me on Tumblr: heartlessblu


	8. when the wall he builds shatters

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to Miss_Macabre_Grey, thanks for your help and you're finally getting what you wanted after all that waiting. I quit, man.

A week passed after Kasamatsu and Kise confronted their feelings for each other and the two went back to their normal routines, but recently, Kasamatsu had to fend off from Kise’s onslaught of his variety displays of affection which riled up the captain to a whole new level. It didn’t helped at all when Kasamatsu’s own team started to tease him about it but they soon learned how wrong it was to piss off their leader. Sometimes they didn’t learn which Kise found very amusing and Kise still proceeded to love Kasamatsu in every way.

Kobori, after hearing about the situation, was pleased to know that he didn’t need to replace Kise with a new partner for Kasamatsu, and eagerly ready to give the two their new assignment. It was another mission that came directly from Rakuzan’s headquarters. 

This mission required only the two of them to go so Kasamatsu and Kise readied up before they headed out. They took their vehicle and attached a cage from behind, crossing the vast dried lands until they reached their destination.

It was a small forest homed to a group of tiger shifters and Rakuzan wanted the fully grown male and female tigers to its collection. Their cubs were to be left alone. 

An easy task for them. Capture the tigers using any means necessary without killing them.

When Kasamatsu and Kise arrived, Kasamatsu made sure to hide their vehicle, covering it with large leaves so it blended with its surroundings. His tranquilizer readied in hand as he motioned Kise with his two fingers to take the skies in his bird form and keep a lookout for anything suspicious, along with subduing anything that proved to be a problem.

The mission to them was nothing new. They had the element of surprise after finding their targets. Kise fought against the winged creatures before he landed in another area of the forest in his canine form, and every shot made by Kasamatsu was a success and the fully grown tigers fell to the ground asleep as their cubs were crying out to them from under a bush.

Kasamatsu frowned but he believed the cubs would survive if they had the will to live without the dependency of their mother and father. One by one, he hauled both of the tigers into the cage and locked the metal bars in place.

He wiped the sweat off his forehead with his black tee and relieved the mission took a short amount of time. He then noticed Kise didn’t come back so he ventured further into the forest to find him.

The deeper he went in, the more alert he felt about his surroundings. He kept the gun steadied and raised in both hands while eyeing at every spot possible for attacks, but nothing came at him. 

He didn’t lower his guard.

Every step he took, his boot added a small crunch against the dead leaves and broken twigs, but he met with silence. 

Kasamatsu ended up at a stream and sighed with relief. He bent his knees and scooped up some of the water, splashing it against his face and around his neck to cool off. It felt amazing. 

Suddenly he felt warm arms wrapped around his body and he stilled against the hard wall, his hand reached for the arm but he didn’t attack. He started to relax when he felt the familiar nuzzle against his neck, the noticeable strands of golden hair on his shoulder while hot breath tickled his cool skin.

Kasamatsu shuddered and released his hold on the arm. He was fine, he thought. With many years of training in Kaijo engrained in his mind and blood, all of that simply disappeared and he just let himself go.

Resilience and strength, they kept him upright and alert. His determination and hard work expressed in every mission he went on and he came back unwavering and strong, but now he felt weak and it frightened him. He never knew the definition of weakness, it wasn’t part of his job because he fought all the way to be where he was now. 

If Kise was to attack him at this moment, Kasamatsu wouldn’t be able to defend himself. Between the two of them, Kise was the strongest. He had the strength of countless animals at his disposal, and with one turn, he can easily snap Kasamatsu’s arm.

Everything Kasamatsu has done until now, how had he let himself falter so easily?

Kasamatsu lost his composure, his arms enveloped around himself as his body shook with the unfamiliar feeling of being vulnerable. A captain should be ready to handle anything that came at him but not this time because Kise was here.

He saw Kise moved until he was in front of him. He noticed the gentle look Kise gave and how those piercing golden eyes settled directly at him as if Kise had figured him out entirely.

“The hell…” Kasamatsu swallowed and hot tears begun to fall down his face but they were gently wiped away with a swipe of an invading thumb.

"Calm down, take deep breaths okay?” But Kasamatsu bit his lips together and glared with distaste. “Ah, I didn't mean to be so forward but I couldn't help myself. I only wanted to comfort you. It's my fault for startling you, captain." 

Kasamatsu slapped Kise’s hand away but too rough. "You bastard." Kasamatsu focused on calming his breathing but his heart pounded rapidly against his chest. Even he couldn't hide the obvious embarrassment written all over his face. His defenseless left himself exposed and crying was the worse.

"It makes me really happy that you can feel this emotion." Kise responded. His face leaned closer until their foreheads met, both of his hands cupped Kasamatsu’s face. “That you’re only human and I’m the only one who knows this side of you. You always acted tough and so serious at times, it’s a little frustrating.” He waited and stared at the captain.

The sudden warmth Kasamatsu felt as their skin touched stung, but he didn’t mind as Kise stroked along his cheeks and fingers roamed through his hair. He liked how it calmed him down as seconds passed so he let himself enjoy this moment a while longer.

“Hey, Kasamatsucchi?” Kise asked quietly, breaking the silence.

“What is it?”

“Do you think God will let me love you twice? This life, and, if he’s merciful, just one other?”

Kasamatsu’s face faltered and wondered what the hell Kise was on about. He took both of Kise’s hands in his and exhaled. “Don’t talk stupid like that. This one is enough to last forever.” 

“How do you know?” Kise sounded uncertain. “What if it doesn’t? What if all of this ends tomorrow? Or in a week or a month?”

“Oi. Didn’t you say that we’ll make do with what we have now and not worry about the future? That the future is uncertain? What we have, it’s enough.” Kasamatsu tightened his hands with Kise’s. “That this love is _enough_ for a long time so don’t worry yourself over it.” 

“I’m not going away.” Kasamatsu said with final and leaned in, kissing the shifter’s lips before pulling away.

Kasamatsu heard a small whine from Kise and felt himself being pulled into the familiar embrace. “I love you, I love you, I love you.” The shifter repeated over until he moved in with a kiss, both mapping each other’s mouths without the need to rush.

Their world never stopped.  


.

They came back to base and left the personnel handle the tigers. Kasamatsu and Kise changed out of their gears, and reported to Kobori about the mission.

After Kobori gave them the clear to go, they went back to their rooms, both of them kept themselves in checked until Kasamatsu closed the door behind them and immediately settled his hands on the shifter, touching him as he crashed his lips into his. 

Kasamatsu eagerly kissed Kise, closing the distance as much as possible while Kise returned back energetically. Kasamatsu pushed him into their rooms, hungrily nipping at the reddened lips until Kise fell back onto their bed. They discarded each other’s shirts on the floor without care and Kasamatsu tasted Kise, his tongue slipping into the moist cavern, feeling Kise’s tongue dancing along his.

Their moans mixed in with each other while their hot breaths ghosted along their skin. Kasamatsu parted before he headed lower, adding light touches along the pulsing neck, suckling against the sensitive area while Kise gasped into the air. His head parted to the side to give Kasamatsu more room and Kasamatsu took the chance to mark him. He bit into the skin and his tongue lapped around it, soothing the pink area.

“Haaah, please…” Kise begged as he buried his hands in Kasamatsu’s hair.

The captain’s hands roamed along Kise’s chest, feeling the tone of muscles shuddering against him as he moved lower and lower until he reached the obvious bulge in Kise’s pants. Without hesitation, he palmed at it until it was fully erected against the fabric.

He gave a squeeze, hearing a slight hiss from Kise until he finally decided to remove the unnecessary garment. The pants came off with a swift tug, revealing Kise’s member already coated with precum against the underwear with a dark stain at its tip. “Wh-what is it?” Kise’s face was red like a strawberry.

Kasamatsu hummed and pulled the underwear down, staring at Kise’s girth with a grin.

“Stop looking at me like that...” Kise managed to say and suddenly yelped when Kasamatsu wrapped around the hot length with his hand, stroking it at a leisure pace. He watched the way Kise’s mouth parted with an ‘o’ and begged him to go faster. 

The shifter’s legs parted and his arms automatically hugged under his knees to keep his legs up in place. His toes curled and his head bent back as Kasamatsu increased his momentum, pushing Kise over the edge while another hand fondled with his sacs, stimulating the sensitive skin in his palms. Kise bucked his hips in response and Kasamatsu wasted no time as he thumbed along the slit of his tip, bringing Kise to his peak.

“Oh, that was quick.” Kasamatsu smiled and licked his hand coated with fluids. He didn’t bother to stop when Kise stared at him shockingly with an obvious blush. “D-Don’t do that!”

“It’s not bad.” Kasamatsu gave a shrug and licked his lips. “Turn over for me, Kise.” Kasamatsu commanded and Kise does without questioning it. “I want to try this, but let me know if it’s too much.”

“Hmm, I don’t mind this position at all.” Kise answered lightly against the sheets.

Kasamatsu lifted a butt cheek and slipped a wet finger inside. He passed through the tight hole with his middle finger, inserting slowly as the insides clenched around his finger. He heard a subtle hiss from Kise’s mouth. “Relax yourself, it’ll feel better soon.” He made sure Kise was comfortable with it before he decided to move.

“Yeah, that… that’s,-hah- feels really good.” Kise managed to say while his hands tightens against the sheets. Kasamatsu resumed and pumped his finger in and out of Kise’s ass before adding a second finger. 

Kasamatsu made a scissoring motion with his two fingers, stretching the slick hole while feeling his fingers being engulfed. Kise clung onto the sheets and made several attempts to tell him how his fingers felt so good inside him. Pleased with Kise’s response, he awarded him with a third finger.

“Oh fuck!” Kise cried out and lifted his hips to grind himself as he sinks deeper into those fingers.

“You’re enjoying this very much, aren’t you?” Kasamatsu grunted as he continued to finger fuck Kise with ease as three fingers penetrated him, moving in and out at a fast pace. Kise couldn’t respond as his teeth bit into the pillows and moaned.

“Yes, that’s… right there, captain. Ah!” When Kasamatsu finally found Kise’s prostate, he curled his fingers upward and pressed. Kise’s form become still and came hard into the bed sheets before Kasamatsu removed his fingers out of him. Kise pouted at the lost feeling.

“God, don’t stop now.” Kise turned his head to look at Kasamatsu in the eye. “I want all of you in me.” 

Grey-blue eyes widened as Kasamatsu gaped at the way Kise went on his back and faced Kasamatsu with parted legs to give him a nice view. His hands journeyed along his chest, brushing both nipples until they were perked and hard against his fingertips. Kise’s throaty moans left a throbbing feel within Kasamatsu’s jeans and he watched how two fingers spread his hole apart, showing a twitching entrance of an innocent pink glistening in view.

It made Kasamatsu hard to swallow but his dick became desperate and painful to ignore.

“Show me then.” Kasamatsu blurted without thinking. “How badly do you want this?”

He heard a keen of a painful whimper and already, Kise shoved two fingers inside him shamelessly. The sound of squelching noises were heard as he penetrated himself into the tight ring of muscles and the breathy sounds escaped his lips. His cock immediately sprung to life, already a trail of white beads trickling downward. 

Kasamatsu watched the way Kise’s entrance swallowed his fingers until it reached his knuckles and another hand stroked his shaft. Kasamatsu couldn’t handle the scene as Kise was muttering his name into the air, his face full of sweat and hair in disarray. Kasamatsu loosened out of his pants, freeing his dripping cock to give it a firm coax until it was ready. 

“I always imagined you inside-ah-me. All this time… I’ve been thinking about your cock.” Kise heaved between words. “Been waiting a long time for it.” He pulled out his sticky fingers with a small pop.

Kasamatsu doesn’t waste any time and centered the tip of his member at the entrance. “I’m going in.” He entered with ease and continued until his shaft was fully in while he kept his hands steady over Kise’s legs. He could hear small pleasures from the blond man as Kasamatsu started to move.

“Oh! That’s… Mmm-that feels really-ah! Shit, keep-keep going.” 

With every grunt, Kasamatsu continued and enjoyed the view of fucking Kise as he entered the hot entrance, his tip pounded against the prostate every time while the shifter demanded to be fucked harder and harder. 

“So close-hah-damn… so good. I’m almost…”

“Yeah, me too.” Kasamatsu whispered back and he thrust into him, his pace became quick and his cock almost ready.

Not before long, they both came at the same time.

Kise slumped against the bed with cum all over his stomach, panting to regain his breath while Kasamatsu pulled back with a sigh, staring at the white fluids dripping out of Kise with fascination. 

He wondered.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m just curious.” Kasamatsu answered before he bent his head, his tongue out against the crease.

“Ah! That’s-that’s…” But Kise became lost as his eyes turned half-lidded with Kasamatsu licking his entrance with a swipe of his tongue. “You’re such a tease!” Kasamatsu smirked, his tongue playfully circling the convulsive hole until he heard soft groans becoming a whimpering mess.

“I know, I know. You want this.” But Kasamatsu took his time to play with him. He wouldn’t do it just yet so he decided to kiss him. His lips brushed against the sensitive place before mouthing against it, coating with his saliva.

“Damn, you’re really-hmph. Good with this…” Kise growled impatiently.

When he thought Kise had enough, his tongue buried into the already stretched hole and moved around the bundle of nerves while he rubbed Kise’s legs in soothing motions. 

It didn’t take long for Kise to climax again.

“You alright? I think it was a bit much.” Kasamatsu spoke as he grabbed a tissue to clean up the mess on Kise’s chest before he settled right next to the shifter, his back resting against the white pillow. 

Immediately, Kise shuffled and laid sideways on Kasamatsu’s lap, his head resting on a naked thigh completely happy but Kasamatsu saw the hint of tiredness in his eyes. “Hmm. You’re right about that but I’m great actually. That was amazing.” 

Kasamatsu nodded and slipped his fingers through the yellow locks, bringing them over Kise’s ears. Kise looked up and lips expanded into a full grin, his eyes shone brilliantly which always left him feeling out of breath.

“Wanna go another round?” Kise begun massaging Kasamatsu’s thigh in a rhythmic circles and moved until he groped the limp member. “I want to be inside _you_ this time.”

But Kasamatsu grabbed Kise by the wrist, not adding any pressure but he saw an obvious frown written all over the shifter’s face. Kasamatsu sighed and released him. Letting someone else to be in control instead of him, he never had anyone to do that but this was Kise, he knew he wouldn’t hurt him. He understood that but to have someone to love him like this, it felt unfamiliar but it didn’t stop the small inkling of wanting Kise to take care of him.

“You’re thinking too much again.” The shifter’s voice seemed calm and patient. “We don’t have to do it today, barely have any energy left, thanks to you.” Kise winked and wrapped his arms around the captain’s waist. “We can do it next time, okay? When you’re ready.”

When he was ready, Kasamatsu considered over it. “Okay.” He managed to say and the small fear seemed to disappear from his mind. He moved until his head rested comfortably on the pillow and Kise automatically fitted himself, the head full of yellow on Kasamatsu’s left shoulder, enabling Kasamatsu to admire the perfect face of his partner. 

He ignored the feeling of the partial wet cum and Kise didn’t seemed bothered by it. They were both tired and Kasamatsu placed a blanket over them. Without any words between them, the shifter added a chaste kiss on Kasamatsu’s lips, Kasamatsu returned it before they both fell asleep next to each other.

.

The next morning, they both got up and showered. It was time for breakfast so they went to the cafeteria together and grabbed a tray of food. Kise was practically beaming and Kasamatsu had to elbow him to get him to stop. “That’s creepy. Don’t do that.” He said to him but who knew if Kise actually listened.

They went to an empty table and soon a friend stopped by with his own tray of breakfast.

“Morning, you two!” Hayakawa sat next to the captain, bearing them both a smile. “So I’ve heard you guys were going at it yesterday.” He suddenly jumped when he noticed the snap of chopsticks in Kasamatsu’s hand.

“Since when did you hear anything like that, Hayakawa?” Kasamatsu turned to glare at his teammate, careful to not raise his voice at him.

“Wait, what is this about the captain getting some?” Moriyama appeared next to Hayakawa, looking all distraught as he sat down. “I didn’t even get the chance to ask that lovely lady at my shift for her phone number and captain already...” His hand hovered over his head in distraught. 

Kise gasped with enthusiasm and shoved a sliced cantaloupe in his mouth. “Oh, no. It’s not like that!” He swallowed before speaking. “He’s the one doing all the topping, I must say he’s pretty good with his mouth-WAH! OUMPH!”

Kasamatsu quickly shoved his own blueberry muffin into Kise’s mouth, shutting him up as soon as possible. He even kicked Kise’s leg for added measure. Kasamatsu huffed at him while sporting flushed cheeks.

“The hell, Kise?!” Not everyone had to know about their private business!

Kise only rolled his eyes and tried a smug look despite the muffin in his mouth.

“Oh, so that’s how it was.” Hayakawa nodded and chugged down his orange juice. “Ah. Well, good for you Kise! The whole team’s been waiting on the news and I’m pretty sure some gained some hefty money from the bet.”

“What bet?”

“Vfet?” Kise and Kasamatsu questioned at the same time. Kasamatsu stood from his seat, glancing down at the sweating Hayakawa.

“Ugh, Hayakawa,” Moriyama warned. “You should get out of here. That’s supposed to be a secret.” He even backed away in his seat as Kasamatsu looked straight at him as if he was ready to burst a vein. “Captain, it’s okay… it’s just a joke!” He laughed but it wasn’t as convincing as he made it out to be. “We’re just playing! Right? Right?!”

Hayakawa finished his last remaining fruit and curled his lips. “Ugh.”

With a crack of his knuckles, Kasamatsu had enough of this embarrassment for one morning. Many times he spent in the gym were put into good use as he dragged both a crying Hayakawa and a desperately pleading Moriyama out of the cafeteria, but before he left, he stared at Kise who was slowly trying to finish the muffin in his mouth.

“I’ll be back.” Which meant ‘do not fucking leave that seat or I’ll will personally make your ass glued to it’.

“Thakt hur thme!” Kise gave him a wave as he chewed. 

On that morning, no one questioned an angry Kasamatsu and his two crying friends being dragged away into some unknown area. Not even Kobori was brave enough to stop him despite getting a bit of money from Nakamura in the end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah... so that happened.
> 
> Thanks for reading, Comments and Kudos are appreciated!


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